101's Anybody?

I guess there's nothing that won't breakdown to pieces after being applied pressure. Someone's gotta be a man and take the blame. And that's the man la rite?

I guess I do need those 101's and manuals.



I'm sorry
S.A.

Sunway Lagoooon

Troy texted me the nite before: "Wang, Sunway Lagoon jom. Ada beran?". And so I replied : "Jangan cabar beb. Meh r"...

The next morning, we were supposta meet at 10am. I woke up at 10am. Gladly, Mal woke up at 10.05am. The rest were already on the way. Crazy spirit aka semangat gila. Haha... So, i got myself together and took off with Mal to Sunway at 11am. We stepped outta the car around 12.15pm. Then we had to spare some minutes to find Sunway Lagoon's entrance. Luckily, after a few dead ends, God gave us light and showed us the way. Maka, jumpalah itu kaunter tiket. Ternganga gak la bila tengok itu tiket harga. RM48. Wooo. It was kinda sad la to see my RM50 note grow wings and fly away... But we went like damn, fuck that, we're going in. Plus orang lain dah masuk pun.


Stepped rite in, stripped down to our bikini's and took a dip in the pool of sexy and nice people. None of the eye candies here really turns me on though. I guess you won't be lookin at hacks if you've already chewed chuppa-chups rite... So, me n Mal met up with the fellas. Troy. Nami. Iskandar. Kalai. Awang. Mal. Jo. WakTang. Reza. 9 beautiful ducks swimming joyful. It sure was mad fun with everybody laughing loud to crazy ass jokes. We played that carpet race thingy first, then we hopped in that upside down ship. Freaky furreal. Thank god i didnt wet my pants riding that. Spinning Cups. Then we went into this rock gallery but no Zuhars or Asykurys around here. Haha... The we rode that Rapid sumthin sumthin... then, some cowboy rides. It was all good. Great day except i was missing a certain company of mine. Someone far away. Xpe kot.
It's all good...

Photo courtesy of jojo

Chalo Brah
S.A.

Now You're Guessin' Who's

I appreciate beauty. That's why. I love to watch em in blue bra's with artistic designs over plain blue bra's.


And I ain't talkin' bout porn. Trust me.

Till next time
S.A.

If You're Still Guessin'

I appreciate beauty. That's why. I love to watch em in ___'s with artistic designs over plain ___'s.




Till next time
S.A.

Questions Of Life And Death

There's a lot of tagging going on. Well, I think it's a lot. Owh, just in case you don't know, tag is a biscuit. Nah, it's this thingy where you get a set of instructions and questions. How do you know you're tagged? Well, you go on the net and read your friend's posts, then hopefully you'll see your name at the tag list. Haha. Sape suruh gatal pegi baca kan. And I was just wondering if i had the chance to create my own set of crappy tag questions, what would it sound like eh? Check it out...


Wow. You're tagged. How do you feel?

Wow. That's nice. Don't you think so?

You're a freakin' genius. Why?

You're not a freakin' genius. Why?

Which is more interesting? A female figure or a male figure.

Why?

When was the last time you bought a new toothbrush?

Do you think of the person you love or have a crush on 24-7?

Do you think of the person you love or have a crush on while you're taking a crap?

What do you think of while taking a crap?

Have you ever had trouble flushing afterwards?

What do you say to yourself when you look at yourself in the mirror?

Is "Tahi Yang Suci" a cool name?

Thank You.


Well, I tried. You're welcomed to try it out.



Chalo Brah
S.A.

Rilek Je

Tadi aku pegi pasar malam sorang-sorang... Mula-mula ingat nak naik motor, tgk-tgk tangki empty pulak. So, aku pon drive unser pegi pasar malam. Sampai-sampai pasar malam, tempat parking yang terang-terang dah habis kena sapu. Maka, terpaksalah aku parking kat tempat yang gelap gelita. Aku belum keluar kereta lagi, aku dah nampak anjing hitam dua ekor usya aku. Tapi aku rilek je. Turun je dari kereta, aku nampak cencurut dua ekor. Tapi aku masih rilek je. Pastu aku nampak ada brader usya aku. Baru aku cuak. Bukan apa, kang aku rilek-rilek lagi, habis aku kena rogol pastu kena bom macam altantuya kang. Maka, aku pun kunci kereta pastu pegi kat pasar malam yang terang benderang tu. Bapak aku suruh beli bihun sup tiga dgn burger empat. Aku pun cari gerai jual bihun sup. Dalam perjalanan, ada gak awek jeling-jeling senyum-senyum. Dia tengah tunggu murtabak dia siap. Tapi aku rilek je dan terus jalan. Aku jalan dari satu hujung A ke hujung B pasar malam tuh. Pastu aku tanya diri aku sendiri, "Haih, hilang mana gerai bihun sup ni?"... Aku pun pelik. Selalunya ada. Aku pun jalan dari hujung B ke hujung A pulak. Awek tadi masih jeling-jeling senyum-senyum. Tapi aku rilek je. Dah sampai hujung A. Tak jumpa jugak. Haih. Tapi aku bukan jenis yang cepat putus asa, so, aku pun jalan lagi sekali dari hujung A ke hujung B. Kali ni, awek tu buat muka pelik pulak. Tapi aku rilek je. Biar la dia nak buat muka macam mana pun kan... Ni dah sampai hujung B. Tak jumpa gerai bihun sup. So, aku pun buat kesimpulan gerai tu off-duty malam ni. Maka terpaksalah aku beli burger tujuh. Aku pegi gerai burger, order burger tujuh kat pakcik tua tu. Aku toleh kiri, toleh kanan, toleh belakang. Bila aku toleh depan, macam magic, dah siap dah. Memang panas baru masak. Ada tujuh semuanya macam dragon ball. Owh okayh la kan, rezeki aku kot. Pastu bila aku nak bayar. Aku pun congak dalam kepala otak berapa nak bayar. "Sebiji singgit tujuh... so, kalau tujuh... urmm... singgit... dua inggit... tiga ing...". "RM11.90", pakcik tu tiba-tiba mencelah time aku tengah congak. Gila ah. Laju betul. Tapi aku rilek je. Time tu apa yang aku pikir, mesti pakcik ni dulu akauntan hebat, dah bersara jual burger plak kan.



Aku bayar pastu aku balik.

Apa punya post ah ni?




Chalo Brah
S.A.

Tag

Just noticed Belle suruh buat tag ni... One thing that's been lingering over my head like a golden ring is mana la korang dapat soalan-soalan cenggini... huhu. I'm guessin' you guys compose sendiri soalan-soalan tu and then jawab pastu pass-pass... cenggitu eh? Ke tak?

Anyways, looks like fun. Why not.



The last person to tag you is?

Kak Belle...

Your 5 impressions towards her…

Matang...
Berotak-otak geliga...
Gila-gila pon iye juga...
Taff woo...
Suka jalan-jalan...

The most memorable thing she had done for you…

Apa eh belle? She helped me find a way untuk pujuk Nina...

If she becomes your lover,you will…

Suruh dia buat laundry untuk aku dan jaga aku dari gigitan anjing-anjing durjana...

If she becomes your enemy you will…

Aku kuarkan tangan kanan aku, kasi straight tegak, jari suma kasi mengadap atas. Pastu tangan kiri kasi letak perpendicular depan tangan kanan. Wrist bertemu wrist. Pastu ZAAAAAP!! Kasi kuar laser. Belle pun jerit-jerit... Muahaha...

Tapi aku kasi chance dia insaf dulu ah sebelum pape pon.

If she becomes your lover, she needs to improve on…

Kasi reduce ketinggian bley ke? Sbb nnt aku nampak pendek... Huhu.

If she becomes your enemy, the reason is…

Sebab dia lagi tinggi dari aku kot.

How do you think people around you feel about you…

Ulat buku rasanya... tak eh?

The character for yourself is…

Penyegan kot... tak eh?

The most ideal person you want to be is…

Nina minat edward cullen. Nak jadi dia ah. Aku dah call dia suruh gigit aku tp dia cakap gigi dia dah reput sebab dia lupa gosok gigi. Haih~~

For the person who cares or likes you, say something for them…

Wah, ada ke? Hye, saya Awang Safuan!!

10 people to tag…

1. Nina
2. Belle
3. Iqbal
4. Lola
5. Imam
6. Nina
7. Belle
8. Iqbal
9. Lola
10. Imam

Who is num 2 having relationship with…

Lola?

Is num 3 a male or a female?

male.

Is num7 and num 10 together would be a good thing?

Urmmm... dua-dua mechi... urmm... good thing kot. Bley study thermo sama-sama. Haha...

How about num 5 and 8?

Wah. Sama spesies tuh... Tapi kalau dah jodoh, kita kena terima...

What is num 1 studying?

Beliau seorang gadis litar... Sebab dia study litar-litar... Soooooo sexy!!

When was the last time u had a chat with them?

A few minutes ago...

Is num 4 single?

Belle?

Talk something about num 2…

Wah. Tadi dah cakap... dah-dah... xleh banyak-banyak. Nnt dia kembang. Muahaha.





Till next time
S.A.

J.A.M.E.S Watts

Aite2. I know nuthin' bout this dude. Just stumbled on this music video of his titled "Wish You Were Here" while I was searchin for Joe Buddens. Weird huh? Well, nuthin' much goin' on about his lyrics or storyline concept except for his flow and the track itself. I really don't know how to explain it. I guess I'm just diggin' that delivery dawg. Holla at cha bwoi!!



Weyh. Anyone know bout this dude? Drop me some infos man.


Hip Hop is in the buildin'...



Chalo Brah
S.A.

A Bowl Of Water

I was eating at this Domino hut where I had to scrap out 20 bucks out of ma dusty jean pockets. The pizza was sized extra-large, wait, extra-extra kot. It was meant for 4 hungry stomachs but in this case, 3 je. 2 kurus, 1 berisi skeyt (me). 2 buncit, 1 x buncit (me). Pizza tuh potong 8. My first friend ate 2 slices. My second friend ate 1 and a half slices. I ate the rest. And since the set we ordered was for 4 peeps, we got 4 bowls of soup too. I gulped 2. So now, was the 20 bucks sayin' bye bye to me worth it? Dunno. You tell me.

Now this ends the introduction to the main topic I wanna debate here on my holy site.

Kitorang bertiga adalah makhluk yg tidak reti bersudu dan bergarfu semasa berpizza. Maka kitorang pon, "Guna tangan sudeyh," rite... Then, we need the sink to wash our hands rite. I let my friends to go off searching for the sink first. And it was a smart move indeed coz diorang sesat masa cari sink tuh sedangkan sink tuh just 4 steps on our right. If I went first, I'd prolly end up using the sink at the restaurant next door.

Then I had this flash in my mind. What if the sink bowls you use at restaurants are replaced by toilet bowls. No, no water taps, strictly just a white bowl with water. With a flush la of course (kejam sgt tuh kalau flush pon xde). Haa... imagine that. Kalau nak lagi best, imagine yourself eating at a restaurant and the toilet bowl was just a few steps from your table. Suddenly, ada la this one women who wants to wash her hands. Dia jalan straight pegi jamban tuh and dips her hand in the white bowl. Tapi time ni okay lagi coz air tuh masih air mutlak. Perempuan tuh chow, datang plak ini laki-laki. "Zraaap" bunyi zip disusuli bunyi air terjun. Hilang kemutlakan air itu... And you're in your seat eating your favourite meal with your ears hearing all that natural melody followed by that flushing sound constantly from time to time. Okay, okay. Maybe you're strong enough to block all that sound out of your mind coz tgh makan meal favourite kan. But once you're done dining, sure you'll wanna wash your hands rite. Muahaha... you stare at the white bowl. Suddenly, the other customers in that restaurant chant "dip! dip! dip! dip! dip! dip! dip!..."... Your heart beat gets faster. Your right hand is shaking. Your forehead is sweating. Fuck that, your whole shirt is already wet of sweat. You hear the toilet bowl join chanting sekali "dip! dip! dip! dip! dip! dip! dip!..."... And at this point, you burst and scream "aaaaaaarghhhhhhhh!!!"...

Tiba-tiba gelap macam orang padam lampu...

You faint.


You wake up five minutes later. You check your hand. And it's already clean. No food stains. No nothing. Straight clean. Dettol pon kalah. You put on a confused face. How could your hands be clean rite... Tiba-tiba this old women stepped up to you and said "I dipped your hand in the bowl to clean it while you fainted kiddo"...




Chalo Brah
S.A.

Huyo...

Taken from page miss piggy...

Wallaweeeeeeeeeeeh....

We're cooool.... Positive feedback tuh, signs of a bright future. Thanks L. Sorry aku conteng2 skeyt...





Chalo Brah
S.A.

Pen And Paper

Like damn, it's been ages since I last wrote a verse. Tried to come up with sumthin' today while bumpin' to Atmosphere's Always Coming Back Home To You. Dapat r tulis skeyt2 but still wack yaw. I guess after a few more scribbled verses, I'll be back on track and hopefully in the booth again.



And I think I need to fix that handwriting too. It looks like black noodles rite. Damn.




Chalo Brah
S.A.

It's That Time Again

Phew... Whut a sem it was... how crazy could it get with all that credit hour, wack tests, copy-pasted assignments, zero marks, nice lecturers, sexy lecturers, and so much more...

Fuck that.

Time to forget the lectures, lecturers, and the rector...
Throw em books away... Putcha tutu horns on...
For the rest, let the devil decide.

I'm back
S.A.

Beautiful Armor

"...Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword..."

"...We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for..."

- Belief, John Mayer

Beautiful it is. No doubt.


Till next time
S.A.

Marriage Thingy (Double Dose)

The First Lady, Amnina speaking yaw...

since belle kept on begging me to do this survey..i guess i have to do it.
(desakan belle susah nk tepis..huhu.)
here it goes.. ^_^

1. How old are you?
=> 19. 4 months lg 20. ooh no..dh nk masuk angka 2+.

2. Are you single?
=> urmm..no.

3. In what age do you think you’ll get married?
=> well..since my parents suh kawen awl.i guess they want me to get married after grad kot.dunno~~ lg awl lg bgs. =)

4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now?
=> insya allah..i hope so. Berdoa siang n malam. =D

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
=> alar..jgn la ckp cmnih.mestila nk ngn dia.huhu..

6. Do you want a garden/beach or a traditional wedding?
=> well..i nk dua2.

7. Your ideal motive?
=> to love and to be loved until infinity~~~( ^_^)

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?
=> got many places in mind.xkn nk tulis smue..xcukup ruang nnti..hehe.
clue : islands n beaches
figure it out..

9. How many guests do you think you’ll invite?
=> dunno..all my frens n his la.

10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding?
=> since i'm the only daughter out of 4. my parents promise me to make it gempak.xtau la..tnye my mom.i xkesah..

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own?
=> traditional vows please..

12. How many layers of cake do you want?
=> wow.since i love cake so much.so, kne la wat tinggi2..hehe. setinggi yg mungkin. =D

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or a simple place?
=> xbest wat kt hotel.everything dh siap.i nk plan n prepare for my own wedding.

14. When do you want to get married, morning or evening?
=> morning kot.coz kalo evening, mlm nnti mesti dh pnt..nnti nk wat bnde laen xleh dh..hihi.

15. You’d rather have your reception outdoors or indoors?
=> well..there are 2 versions.kt dlm cre melayu.kt luar ‘exposed’.haha..bleh ke cmnie?

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom?
=> urmm..pe slhnye.he deserves it.hehe..

18. Name the song/tune you’d like to play at your wedding.
=> smue lagu romantik lew.kalo dia nk add his rap songs into it pon ok gak.=)

19. Are you a morning person or a night person?
=> morning n night. Depends..but mostly morning.

20. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one?
=> light one of course.no tensed put into it.aslkn we're happy.dat's enough oredi..hehe.

21. What age do you want to get married?
=> hmm..around 23.

22. Describe your ideal husband/wife.
=> smue ade kt dia.minus the smoking.coz he promised to stop after marriage.

23. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife?
=> both.coz he likes to eat gne tgn.n i prefer to use fork & spoon.

24. Champagne or red wine?
=> huh?haram kot.sparkling drink can replace it.n more fresh juices.
healthy drinks only~~
carbonated drinks are not necessary.
sori cyg~~

25. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
=> of course right after. why wait? =D

26. Money or household items?
=>money makes the world go round n round.=)

27. Who will pay for the bills?
=>I’m depending on him. Xpe kn cyg?

28. Are you ready for married life?
=>Not now.still too early. Marriage = commitment. Not prepared yet.

29. Do you think you will still be a virgin until you get married?
=>asked him to wait...hahaha.

30. Will you always be true to your wife/husband?
=>insya Allah. Anything for him.

31. How many kids would you like to have?
=>nk byk. =)

32. A new house for a newly wed or an old one?
=>mestila bru.smue bru.furnitures n all.tuh la kne jimat mulai skrg.hihi..

33. Will you celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding or diamond wedding?
=>i love diamond! diamond wedding lar.

34. What kind of cuisine would you like for your wedding?
=>nk smue jenis mknn.tp yg wajib ade..bihun tomyam.hehe..

35. Will you record your honeymoon in a CD or DVD?
=>yes.it’s a must.just in case one of us got amnesia.bleh tgk blk..huhu.

36. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next?
=>saphuan sayang~~ and the rest of my frens yg xwat lg.

___________________________________________________________________________

And this is yours truly...

I am the victim of the situation, the ant in between raging elephants, and the entire equivalent. Before we go further down this lane, I need to foretell that I am forced into this. Tak tipu!!

1. How old are you?
19. But my metabolic age is 16. Awet muda bai!!

2. Are you single?
I’m pawned owned.

3. In what age do you think you’ll get married?
Pihak perempuan nak awal eh? Uh oh… I’ll have to ask my piggy bank about that.

4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now?
=> insya allah..i hope so. Berdoa siang n malam. =D (sorry bie. Pinjam jap.)

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
You gotsta be kidding me. Batu dua la aku jawabnya kalau aku jawab soalan nih.

6. Do you want a garden/beach or a traditional wedding?
Beach. Mamma sitaaaa!! Hehe.

7. Your ideal motive?
Insurance of love assurance. Mine forever.

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?
Somewhere exotic and classy like my bie. Like Hawaii. Area Mediterranean pon okay gak.

9. How many guests do you think you’ll invite?
I’ll need to make an invitation list. So, everyone be good to me now. Hehe.

10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding?
Extravagant la beb. Why settle for less rite.

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own?
Urmmm… urmmm… can I do it the “I do” style? Haha. Just kidding man. Of course la traditional.

12. How many layers of cake do you want?
She loves chocolate cake more than me. So, ikut pihak perempuan.

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or a simple place?
Reception at simple place. Hotel for sumthin else. Can ah? =)

14. When do you want to get married, morning or evening?
X kesah. Morning ah kot. I wake up early maa…

15. You’d rather have your reception outdoors or indoors?
Indoors. I’m one shy mafaka. No bluff.

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom?
Wajib dengan cute little flower girls, burung merpati banyak2, and a scratch deejay. Kinda like the wedding scene in the third Lord Of The Rings movie.
Chiki-chiki-cheka-check. Haha.

18. Name the song/tune you’d like to play at your wedding.
Piano plus violins plus a humming group.

19. Are you a morning person or a night person?
I’m not sure. Morning pon iye. Malam pon iye. Urmm… malam ah. That’s way fun than morning rite.

20. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one?
Light. Ice chill it.

21. What age do you want to get married?
Dunno. Ask my piggy bank.

22. Describe your ideal wife.
Someone who knows me well. Mild-tempered. Lovable. Sweet and cuddly. Just like her.

23. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife?
Eh kalau makan biasa2 memang ah pakai tangan. Kalau grand dinner, guna fork & knife. CLASSSSY....

24. Champagne or red wine?
Champagne sounds cool. But I hear red wine is better. Dilemma.

25. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
How about before the wedding? Haha… Mestila right after.

26. Money or household items?
Dolla dolla bills yaw!!

27. Who will pay for the bills?
Saya faham dan akur.

28. Are you ready for married life?
Study maa… plus piggy bank x mengizinkan lagi.

29. Do you think you will still be a virgin until you get married?
You think?

30. Will you always be true to your wife/husband?
Yes. That’s my word.

31. How many kids would you like to have?
Urmm… ikut pihak perempuan.

32. A new house for a newly wed or an old one?
Baru laa. Kena la ada classs…

33. Will you celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding or diamond wedding?
Pekebendanya ni? Diomand wedding sounds cool.

34. What kind of cuisine would you like for your wedding?
Ayam, Ikan, Itik, Daging, dan Udang. Masak pedas2 ye...

35. Will you record your honeymoon in a CD or DVD?
I want my own version of Newlyweds like Nick and Jessica. Can ah? Then air it on MTV!!

36. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next?
Namimoto, Yennader, Si Kecil, Akayleley, Afiqiqi, Kalakalakai, Iskundur, Nor(mal)a, Nor(mam)a.



We'll be back.
A.A.

Another Villain Wannabe

Joker, Green Goblin, Darth Vader, Sylar and many more are villains in their own right and terms. Some people adore them, some even worship them. I do. Thanks to them the world is an interesting place. Without them, superheroes would be wearing 40 waistline sized pants rite.

Back to reality. Now there's this one Graduate Assistant (G.A.) in my ITPG lab session. I don't know his name and I don't wanna know his name. All I know is he's fat, ugly, and mean. Get the picture? If this was a movie and I was the leading star hero, I'd give this dude the role of a gay stripper. Shit, if he was the villain, it wouldn't be a movie. It'd be like one of those National Geographic documentaries about how I kicked his ass.

Now why is this fag so disgusting in my eyes?

Last year, I was kicked out of a test coz this dude caught me tryna help a brother out. It ain't like I did sumthin' wrong right? Someone's desperate for help here, how could I not help right. Funny thing is, Is thought I passed my paper early coz I finished early, so he stood up and followed me out of the testroom.

About a month ago, I showed up kinda late for a lab test. And then, dude showed up at the door frontin' with his belly and started shoutin' in front of my face. And to make it even worse, dude had his saliva sprayed all over my face. Fuck that, I was just 5 minutes late. Let me in and I'll show you how I get it done before you could even say fuck 5 times slowly.

And today, I had to walk all the way from the lab to my crib and back again just to print out a map. I had the answers penned down already, what use is the map? All because this dude wanted the map. Print it yourself laa.

Dude's kinda lucky he's still breathing just cause I'm feelin' a lil merciful today. 6 to infinity beb... ^_^

All I wanna say to the dude is...
I hope you graduate early, get a job, get fired, then go broke. And owh, get some slimming pills too. Fuck you.


This was fun.




Chalo Brah
S.A.

Pelik

S & A berborak-borak...

S: Semalam gua tunggu tren LRT kat stesen dekat dengan umah gua.

A: Eh brader, tolong skeyt. Apahal umah ko lak, umah aku kot...

S: Iyo... Iyo... umah ekau.

A: Haa... camtu ah. Pastu? Apokono?

S: Lepas gua sampai situ, gua tengok tren xde. Gua pon cakap kat brader yang tengah berdiri sebelah gua, "Aiseyman, ni gua nak ngamok ni. Ekau tau x gua dah lambat nih?". Pastu brader tu blurr. Mata dia terkebil-kebil. Gua pon malas ah nak layan brader tu dah dia buat cenggitu kat gua.

A: Jahat gila syal brader tu buat cenggitu kat ko...

S: Tu ah. Tp xpe... Gua pon cari tempat duduk. Gua nampak dua kosong. Satu sebelah tabliq nih, lagi satu sebelah awek seksi nih. Muka ngan cutting dia saling tidak tumpah, umpama Hannah Tan tuuu. Dia duduk tangan mendagu. And then, dia nampak gua usya dia. Dia senget kepala ke kanan skeyt, pastu dia senyum. Dalam hati gua ni gua dah macam, "Aiseyman, aiseyman, aiseyman, .....".

A: Uih. Apokono ko x ajak aku sekali semalam?

S: Lu tido ah time tuh.

A: Pastu ko duduk sebelah sape?

S: Haaa... Ni la gua nak citer part paling best. Gua duduk sebelah...

A: Ko ni nakal syal. Ko duduk sebelah awek tu kan? Kan? Kan? Kan?

S: Apokono ekau ni? Mesti ah gua duduk sebelah tabliq tu... Best beb. Dia layan zikir. Siap bawak tasbih lebih lg. Dia ada offer kat gua tasbih tuh, tp gua refuse. Gua guna rantai gua. Tapi bila gua baru nak start layan zikir ngan brader tabliq tuh, tren datang. So, x dapat gua nak layan zikir...

A: Ko ni bab kencing aku hebat je kan?

S: Mana ada beb. Betul je apa gua citer... So, gua pon bangun ah kan nak masuk tren. Tp bila tren tu stop, mesti pintu tren tu tak stop depan gua. Gua bukan ah berkira ke apa, tapi setiap kali gua nak naik tren, tren tu buat cenggini ngan gua beb. Mesti tren tuh takmo stop betul-betul depan gua.

A: Maknanya dia takmo ko naik dia ah tu. Eh, tapi aku rasa tiap kali aku nak naik tren pon jadi cenggitu. Mesti part tingkap tren tuh yang stop depan aku.

S: Pastu bila gua masuk tren, tren penuh sesak. Gua kena berdiri kat pintu. Tp yang paling pelik, bila tren dah mula gerak, gua usya la luar tingkap. Brader tabliq tuh tak naik tren. Dia tunduk je. Pastu kepala dia naik skeyt, pastu pusing skeyt. Dia usya gua direct. Pastu dia senyum. Gua pelik. Pastu dia pegi duduk sebelah awek seksi td yang juga tak naik tren. Pastu diorang dua-dua senyum kat gua. Mata gua terkebil-kebil tengok diorang makin jauh bila tren pon dah start gerak.

A: Uih, pelik tuh.

S: Haa... Pastu tiba-tiba gua terasa sentuhan kat bontot gua. Gua pusing. Ada sorang brader ni. Dia jadi cuak semacam. Gua tanya dia, "Lu apahal?". Pastu dengan nada yang cuak-cuak dia membalas, "Saya ni penyeluk saku bang. Cari rezeki. Saya nak amik dompet abang tp bila saya seluk. Xde pulak. Abang letak katne dompet abang?". Justeru itu, gua pun start cari. Memang tiada.

A: Haaa... ada pada siapa ya?

S: Teka ah...


p/s: lama seh tak merapu...


Chalo brah
S.A.

The Paper Myth

Money can't buy happiness eh?

tapi bila pikir-pikir balik...

Let's see who's happy without money... none.


That's why we pay zakat rite? So everybody's happy...

Raya Elok-elok...

The Wheels On The Bus Goes Round And Round

Word. Been a while since I traded my red ten's for a scribbled piece of paper and a seat on a bus. Too much hitchhiking, I totally forgot how it felt to be a backpacker. (Blame Troy, Tmot ngan Mal) =P... Thanks-a-milli ar Akay coz hantar aku. He sacrificed his nap time just so I could make it on the bus ride. I thought it was gonna be a lonesome journey. Guess not. Couple of minutes after I sat my ass down at the bus station, Cha datang. And a couple of minutes after Cha sat his ass down at the bus station, Chong datang. And a couple of minutes after Chong sat his precious ass down at the bus station, ada lagi datang tapi tak kenal. So, in the end there were three happy utp asses kissing the floors of the bus station.

Fast forward...
Hopped on the bus...
Sayonara to the bus station...
Welcome to dreamland...


............................


3 hours later...
Kuala Lumpur... Kuala Lumpur...
Datang dari jauh... Maruah dipertaruh...
Dengan impian untuk berjaya...
(Playlist suddenly jumps to 'Aku di Kuala Lumpur' by Malique)
Eyes wide open...

Through the bus window I saw the glorified Twin Tower sights, the cramped crowd of mixed colours, the cursed traffic jams, and them glorified sexy light taned ladies in cursed mini skirts. Nah... kidding. Puasa lorh. Anyways, it felt real goooooood to be back in my holy city of sins. They say "...it's not where you from, it's where you at that matters...". True but we gotta stay grounded and stick to our roots rite. Shieet, patriotic la plak. Be proud of where you're from! If not, you can kiss what the bus station just kissed. OK.

Not exactly a spot I'd suggest but boley laa...


Cha tak nampak tong sampah tepi tu.


I ain't frontin'. Get it?


He ain't either. We coo coo like that.


Guest Model: Cha

CEO of TYS : Ya boy...

And owh. I was just about to board the LRT when I realized I did'nt tell my mom yet I was coming home for the weekend. Cool rite?


Chalo Brah
S.A.

Thank You Lah Pak Lah

fokus

fokus lagi

tadaaa!

Shit. It's time to implement plan B.

Hint: 14's are still the same. Muahaha...


Stay healthy!

Till next time
S.A.

And So It Unfolds

A whole day without a puff. I thought days would turn out better.

Guess I was wrong...

Now where's my lighter.

Shield of Achilles

"You're fighting so you don't have to fight again"

Never Back Down. An awesome movie with cool bruise, soul, slick moves, mad skills and hot babes. Now I'm thinkin' of gettin' my ass back into taekwondo classes. Just to switch back into black belt mode. There's sumthin magical about this movie, all of a sudden everybody in the house got crazy on pumpin' biceps and shapin' abs. Especially Kalai. Shit, we even punched each other's abs like in the movie. It feels real goood. What more can I say? Shit is inspiring. I'm savin' all the trash talk so you folks can go download and watch the movie and still have time to work on some tones afterwards.

Sunset training

Training tumbuk perut

Gayut-gayut

Jake Tyler

Mister Sifu Jean Roqua

I want one for my birthday, can ah?

Protien juice

Babe of the movie

Them bad ass dewds

Check out the eye.

Ryan

Even heroes feel pain


And the final strike....

Pasrah

Owh. And if anybody feels like brawling, you know my digits...


Chalo brah
S.A.

Modern Day Pirates

Guess who went freakin' and tourin' on the weekend? Them cool dude's; SA, Amir Salvo, Anjang, and Kerol Cipot. This is the closest ever to a dream team, nahmean... This super duper team was conceived just to sign up for the convofair Treasure Hunt baby! Now, the treasure map took us all the way to Kellie's Castle, Taman Herba, Gua Tempurung, Kuala Woh, Teluk Intan, Bota, and back again. Who's ride you say? Mestila Skyline 20 inched rims milik Amir Salvo beb... and the best part of the journey is... *jeng*jeng*... Amir berbesar hati membenarkan kitorang mengasap-asap dalam Skyline dia... Sankyu! Siap ada ash tray; satu depan, satu belakang...

Buah Tropika

Teman-teman treasure hunter. Eh, tu bukan Anjang ke?

Ha'ah dowh... dia r tu!

Kitorang memang style... Kamceng beb.

Kellie's Castle... spoooooky... ~dalam aku ada hantu~

Amir: Perabot ikea kita beli semalam letak sini tau...

Suicidal thoughts

Naik

Naik lagi

Sitting ducks

145km/h + marlboro = Amir on the wheels.

The Navigator... sixth sense

Anjang + Kerol. The brains and brawns of the team.

Pergh... Ni keje korang dok belakang...

Situasi sebelum masuk Gua Tempurung

Nak jugak...

Ada jambatan

Bawah Jambatan ada sungai

Atas jambatan ada Cipot

Tuntung sorang satu

Kami sayang tuntung

End of the day, everything about the trip was dope as hell minus the crappy clues. Dengar citer bulan puasa ni ada lagi satu treasure hunt... hmmm...

p/s: I made another history today. =)


Till next time.
S.A.